Well Hello... Mr. Loneliness

Hey Loneliness my old friend! Looks like we meet again! But then you were never ever gone, with me all along. So how are you doing? When would you be leaving? Don’t you have other better things to do, instead of wanting to do you? Like an uninvited guest you’ve overstayed your welcome (but in the first place when were you ever welcomed), so when would you be packing your bag and leaving, cause you’re the one thing I don’t need even if I ain’t grieving.

Like a lover you refuse to leave my side, if that’s case I would rather love than have you by my side, and if there were a lover then there would be no other to leave me lonely alone. 

Aren’t there others to stalk, more deserving candidates that I am not. Why don’t you give them a short, as you’ve done for me, to get to know you really well from all the time we’ve spent, hopefully not birds of a feather, cause there’s no way I would want us to flock together. 

Isn’t there a poor soul out there who deserves to be more lonelier than me (though I really pray not). Don’t you think it’s time we move on, to better things in life, though I wonder and shudder thinking what would be better for you. 

If you love me then why do you hurt me? Why do you revel in the agony of cutting me and leaving me bleeding. Such torture, I say, is sadistic, unbecoming of a lover. But then you’re unlike any lover, you’ll just laugh as I lay there bleeding, leaving me to wonder what pleasure do you get from doing so? What high do you get from making me feel low and alone. 

May be it’s time we take a break from each other, not the Ross and Rachel kind, a real kind of break, let’s say forever. Try to find another, to say goodbye to each other. To bid farewell, not for a while or a mile, but for all time to come. I really hope we don’t see each other... ever.

Everyday is Yoga Day

Well we recently concluded national, or was it international, Yoga Day. It’s the one day when you have people bending like pretzels, into positions that you never thought was humanly possible. Flooding the internet, social media with pictures and videos of them performing various yoga asanas in celebration of the day.

But then you also have those who perform yoga everyday. They perform yoga asanas at each and every part of their day. For example, they do the reshape asana where they contort their body into different shapes so as to try an squeeze into any space, which they are fortunate enough to find, in a crowded Mumbai local. Then you have the hang-in-there asan, where you hang on for you dear life, to every little nook and crevice, that you can find while traveling by say a Virar local (I am a Western suburb guy, no bias here). Then you have the shrink asan where to you try to squeeze as much as possible so as to fit into that fourth seat or make place for that fourth seat. 

If these asanas weren’t enough then you have the holding your breath asana where you have to perform breath control when you’re pressed to someone with a well oiled head. The sarso and the naryal ka tail help you test your limits on how long you can hold your breath, and not to forget the various sweaty armpit, which you would be unfortunate to smell depending on your height. You also get a good stretch while trying to reach for the overhead handles that are two people away.

Then you come to office and you have to be constantly performing another set of asanas like the ballet asana where you constantly need to be on your toes, unless you’re the manager or the boss. You also have to do the bend-over asana where you need to bend forward and backward and in all directions to keep your leads, managers, bosses, clients, just about everyone, happy.

At the end of the day, when you’re back home after a tiring and stressful day, all you want to do is perform the shavasana, close your eyes and be dead to the world (not literally, hope you get the gist of what I mean).

So spare a thought for these poor souls, for whom every day is yoga day. They don’t even flood the social media and the Internet with videos and images of them doing yoga; most the time I don’t think they are even aware of what they are doing, but still do it every single day.

The Ambassador Quandary

Let’s face it, even though you may not acknowledge it, flat out deny it, but in your hearts of hearts you want it, long for it, pine for it, pray for it, like the desert praying for rains. You want to be known, if not famous, you don’t want to be just another face in the crowd, but definitely not infamous.

So when you are selected to be one of the Ambassador of the IDBI Federal Life Insurance Mumbai Half Marathon, for 2018, (phew that was quite a lot of words to type) you let a big wooohooo, because you have finally made it. But then you ask your self what did you do to deserve this honour (if not accolade... but then for someone like me it amounts to something like it)? This replaces the previously silly niggling question, what do I need to do become an ambassador (come on, I know you too must have thought about this)?

Perplexing and confounding as it sounds (and downright silly) let me try and analyse what could possibly have led to me being selected for this profound honour (ok now I sound like a typical Miss India... but hey let’s go with the flow) not just for my sake but for the sake of every person whose brains are definitely getting fried with this burning question (and for some... why him and not me... Us may kya hain jo muj main nahi (wow I am seriously trying to flex my silly Hindi)). So for these poor lost, perpetual envious souls, let’s analyse. 

Being a runner, the first requirement would be podium finisher. But hey I have yet to get my podium. Still waiting for it, hoping for it, longing for it, praying for it. Maybe I just need to hit the big four oh and then I get to compete with the seniors, people more or less my age, may be then I could stand any chance (come on, I can’t run at the speed of runners  half my age and let’s face it, I am not getting faster with age). The only time I stood on the podium was in school when I ran track and I don’t think anyone knows about it (or do they now).

Another possibility is being an ultra runner. But hey I haven’t run anything beyond 42km and that too I have struggled (still smarting from not completing my 42 at TMM), and I have shied and refrained from all the 12 hour and 24 hours runs. So this is definitely not the reason for my selection.

Another point of contention would be popularity. But hey as compared to my fellow ambassadors I don’t think I am that popular, or so I think (just not trying to be humble). Yep I have seen a spike in the number of friend requests on Facebook and follow request on Instagram but really I don’t think I have a dedicated followers. Heck I have just one follower for my blog. So I am not sure if popularity has anything to do with my selection.

Another reason, which I can think of, is being an inspiration. But then I don’t have no inspirational story to tell. I haven’t had to overcome adversity or had dramatic weight loss. Dang I am still trying to loose weight but it doesn’t want to get lost at all. My life is definitely not what inspirations are made of, in fact it is far from it. But then I do find joy cheering others on and seeing friends finish on the podium.

Shoot it seems like I am running out of reasons to analyse but I am still far from the true reason. It feels like the truth is out there but it is eluding me. Dang I am even begun to be over dramatic about it.

Well two people who can surely throw light on this predicament (hey this is not my predicament). Maybe I can ask Sunil Sir or Sangeeta ma’am (or just ask both of them) on why did they choose me, cause the nation wants to know, ok ok, not the nation just curious people, me included. So till I get their response, I will revel in my newfound popularity, as well as responsibility, while those who envy can eat their heart out.... just kidding.