The MeToo movement has been around for over a year now, but only recently it has found its way to Indian shores. Suddenly you have women (as of now) who have found their voice to speak up and talk about the harassment they face, they had faced, they continue to face. It may have occurred today, or yesterday, or ages ago, but they have suddenly found a voice, courage to speak their truth, to stand up and no longer remain silent.
But with every movement, there will be brickbats with the bouquets, the naysayers, the doubters, along with the supporters, the critics along with the advocates. We all have a right to our opinions, the way we perceive things and situation, but let not that perception come in the way of your humanity. And yes you will also have those who would want to make the most from this situation.
It may sound corny, and can be taken as just another hashtag, but make no mistake MeToo is a movement. The jokes, the memes were always going to be there, but some are downright distasteful and mean and demeaning.
There have been write ups and forwards and open-Ed’s dismissing these as sob stories, fame seekers, questioning why the victim took so long to tell it, why were they weak not to retaliate or complain? Well these are sob stories, maybe they are not. There are few who maybe attention seekers, but only a few of them are. While one may question why they took so long, we’ve would not know what went through their mind.
We may argue that they should have complained to someone or told someone about it, this is not the way a strong woman or man should behave. But then the fear, the shock, the moment of shame, the fear of not being believed, the fear of name calling, all are the root cause of silencing them. There are instances of both men and and women who suffered abuse at the hands of close relatives, family friends, neighbours, people they trusted, who choose to remain silent about their abuse, let it eat them from within, change the course of their lives, shatter them, but always afraid to speak their truth.
You may say strong women would have stood up to their oppressors, given back, slapped them, but is there really a decorum on how one should behave in such situations, isn’t it a kin to telling your son that boys don’t cry? Even the strongest of people have their weak moments, even the strong of people may feel stunned, numbed, May choose to bury it in the recesses of their mind, hoping it all may just be a nightmare which can wake of from.
They may not retaliate, but that doesn’t mean their not strong. It takes just one push, one person to stand up, to start a domino effect, to have a ripple effect, to give them strength to stand up. So don’t put them down, don’t mock them (like some leaders of the free wold have), don’t be trumpian in your behaviour. They aren’t asking you for your sympathy or your tear, they just want to speak their truth and let it set them free from the vicious pain that envelops them.
You have your right to your doubt, you have your right to your opinion, you have the right to come to your conclusion, but let that conclusion not be drawn from a mob mentality, from a narrow perception, from a witch hunt. Try make an informed unbiased conclusion. Remember, you’ll never know how it feels, till it happens to you, you’ll never know how you will react, till you find yourself in the same situation. Right now you can only say they way you think you’ll behave, but the words and actions are two different things.
So don’t dismiss these stories, they may not be seeking your support, or your attention, they just want to be heard, just want the truth to set them free. They just want to live in a world where no person, man, woman or child, would need to stand up and say, MeToo.
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