.. Dance away the Blues!!!

“Put on your red shoes and dance the blues”... sang David Bowie. Well I don’t quite have a red shoe, and neither can I dance the blues. But I can sure put on my dancing shoes (which shows no sign of red on it), and dance away my blues.

I don’t quite have two left feet! No sireee I don’t! I am damn sure about it. And I am sure rhythm is always going to get me, and I definitely don’t dance like the drunk uncles at a weddings. I can sure hold a beat, though I am not quite sure I can dance to it!

There’s something liberating about dance. It’s no just rhythms and beats, or steps and choreography. It’s a mean to set your soul free. It’s an expression of self, of your inner feelings, a fluidity of movement, letting you express the words you cannot speak, through movement. 

It has become my happy place, where I can escape to when I feel the world is conspiring against me, when nothing seems to be going my way, when anxiety threatens to consume, when I am struggling to maintain my sanity, hen I feel broken and beaten. Dance has been my go to therapy. Helping me forget my cares, my pain, helping ride out the lows I go through, loose myself in the moment. 

And though I may have struggled to find my feet (even though I still contend that I don’t have two left ones), though I may have been intimidated by partners, struggled to pick up choreography, got in my head, let my nerves get a better of me, I can’t help my dancing feet, cause they can’t just stand still, dancing to the beats of my heart, the rhythm of the blood flowing through my veins.

Then you have friends who bring joy to you, helping you not just to dance but being there for you when you need them. Helping you find your feet when you’re little bit unsteady. Your support system that you didn’t knew you needed. Seeing them brings joy to you like a child meet his friend after a vacation.

And although you my have goofed up your certification, you yet look forward to giving the next level and in even more dance forms. And though you struggled to pick up a dance form you thoroughly enjoyed performing it. You totally immersed yourself in it, and was lucky to dance with your best partner, helping you put your best foot forward, especially in front of people who mean the world to you.

So in the end you can’t wait to see where the road leads me, where these dancing feet take you. Though I technically can’t really say that the journey has only just begun, because it has been a while I have been on this road, and boy am I learning and enjoying it, with friends who have become a dancing family. So here’s to many more memories to make, so many more dance forms to learn, so many friends to make. Here’s to dancing away the blues!

.. Ahead of the Beat

It’s good to stay ahead in the game, a step ahead of the competition, but it’s never too good, or right, to stay ahead of the beat. Boy did I learn this the hard way, as if I wasn’t already aware about it.

As I stood there awaiting my turn, I could feel the butterflies fluttering around vigorously in the pits of my stomach. Each moment making me more nervous as I patiently awaited my turn, as one after the other, students went in to perform their sequence in the chosen style. 

I had practiced all I could, learned the sequence, and was now raring to go, but I had to wait, wait till it was my turn. And as I waited I could feel those nerves work themselves up. If I practised anymore l would be one mass of sweat, knowing the way I do, I would end up having a Mandakini moment.

During the coffee break we posed for pics, clicked group pics, dance poses and goofy poses. This helped take off the edge, lightening up the moment, at least for a while. But once done the nerves were back with a bang.

And when the moment finally arrived, I made a quick sign of the cross (as I always do), took a deep breath, reminded myself that I got this, and took Minelle’s hand (who was partnering all the guys). Bowing towards the examiner, Mr Hunt, who asked me which style I would be dancing. After stating that I would be doing the cha cha and the salsa, I got into partner hold, awaiting Conrad to play the music so I knew which style to dance on.

I breathed a sigh relief when it turned out to be the cha cha, on a song I was familiar with. So I got into the cha cha hold and started on 2, trying my best to maintain my frame while trying to look poised and confident. But then I let my nerves get the better of me and I could feel myself floundering a bit. I looked at Minelle who was looking at me, counting for me, trying to keep me on beat. And when Conrad asked to restart again, I could feel my heart sink like a rock, fast and quick, to the pits of my stomach. What I feared was happening.

I regrouped  myself and got ready for a second time, willing myself to get it right this time around. Alas once again the nerves got the better of me and I found myself a step ahead of the beat, stumbling. I tried to look towards Minelle like a helpless, lost puppy, who was once again counting and trying to get me on beat, trying her best to ensure I gave it my best. But somehow my brain seemed to have frozen over and and legs didn’t move the way it should. There was no coordination between my head and my limbs. I hesitated and had couple, ok, quite bit of missteps, pausing a sec to regroup myself, hoping that this ordeal would be over soon.

I breathed a sigh relief when Conrad paused the music. One part done now on to the next one which was bit more tricky as I knew Salsa wasn’t my forte. But to my surprise, the it went smoother than the cha cha. Well not as smooth, still rough around the edges, a bit hesitant, some missteps. But on the whole a bit better, if definitely not perfect. 

I finally looked towards the examiner, Mr Hunt, bowed, who returned the bow with a warm smile, making me  wonder if it’s just a formality wala smile, or a consolatory one, or was it a genuine one? Well what else did you expect from an overthinking, bumbling fool.

As I exited the room, there was this feeling of disappointment, knowing that I could do better, knowing that I hadn’t given it my best. I thanked Minelle, picked my bag, wished the rest the very best and left in a hurry. Didn’t want to stay back any longer lest I feel all the more lousy with my performance. I left feeling a bit low, dejected and disappointed with myself, cause there was no one but myself and my nerve to blame.

That evening as I chatted with my friends, who helped me realise that I was being too hard on myself (something I was and am painfully aware about). We are all novices, not professionals, and so we are bound to make mistakes, especially when it’s the first time we are giving such an examination, brave enough to take up this challenge. But the important thing is to stay calm, and let not those mistakes bring you down. Learn from it and move on. Take everything in your stride, as an experience and learn from it. You are brave enough to undertake. So what if you were a step ahead of the beat, you’ll learn and find a way to stay on the beat.

There’s Something About the Waltz

There’s something beautiful of the waltz. The rise and fall, the elegance of it all. The fluidity of the movement, makes it all seem like you’re floating on air,  as you twirl around the room, making the most of the whole floor. And you maintain the hold, maintain the frame, making it look elegant and classy, a step above all the gyrating and pelvic thrusting of other dance forms.

There’s something magical about the waltz when done right, makes it all seem so effortless, so elegant, so beautiful, liking gliding on air. There’s something dreamy about it, maybe that’s what makes it all seem so magical.

The music is lilting and melodious. There’s no thumping, or heavy bass. It’s pure rise and fall, soothing to the ears and mind. Captures your spirit and carries you with it. It envelopes you in it and you can’t help yourself but be carried away with it, to let the music move you, run through and rise and fall till reach a crescendo.

Theres something about the waltz that it’s no longer about moving back and forth and side to side. Its all about drifting with the music. It’s not all high energy and quick movements, but movement that’s graceful, that’s elegant, that’s classic, and most of all breathtaking.

There’s something about the waltz that made me fall in love with it, that’s makes me move to the music, leaving all the cares and worries and pains and stress behind and let music and the dance carry me away. There’s something about the waltz.

My Two Not So Quite Left Feet

I don’t quite have two left feet but then the right ones don’t always get it right!!! These feet have a mind of their own and don’t always go the way you want them. 

They say all pavwalas by default know how to jive, something that’s ingrained in their being, by default. I am not sure if that’s quite true but what I do know I have managed to learn the pavwala jive, a rare breed in the world of hip-hop, Bollywood, twerking and what not. So when you play jive music you’ll find me on the floor, pulling siblings and friends, while my other non-jiving friends sit back and watch, nursing their drinks and their ego, observing as I twirl my partner around the dance floor, with all eyes on me, trying my best not to drop them, which I have unfortunately done a couple of time (let’s blame that on heels and lack of balance). And when they begin to play Bollywood or hip-hop you’ll find me fading in the background, away from the spotlight.

There’s something about ballroom that has always drawn me towards it. The grace, the elegance, the fluidity of movement, the poise, the sensuality, the sexiness, without it being vulgar or cheap. Always felt that pull towards ballroom (and I blame it on my love for watching Dancing with the Stars and So You Think You Can Dance).

So the most natural thing would first find a ballroom dance class and the next would be to actually attend it. I had learned Salsa from Salsa India Dance Company. But then that was almost a decade ago, and like memory, when you don’t put those steps into practice, it tends to slip away from you (though the basics and the counts still remain with you). So, not quite on a whim, joined Conrad Coelho Dance Company, to learn the finer points of ballroom, learn other forms, furthering my dancing repertoire (if ever have one), to add elegance and poise and a bit of sensuality (don’t really subscribe to the thought that a guy who’s good on the floor, is good in the sack, or it just may be).

The best thing about a dance class is that you don’t really need partner. You can come there alone and still dance with all the ladies in the room. So you better stock on that deodorant, carry a towel (after all who wants to dance with a sweaty smelly dance partner). You are all at the same level, even though you may know a bit of dance, you are still learning the steps of something you may have not done  before. So you go quick-quick-slow, doing the New York, the Cuban Rocks, the Arm Lock, of the Rhumba (the vertical expression of a horizontal wish. You have to hold her, like the skin on her thigh is your reason for living. Let her go, like your heart's being ripped from your chest). You try to mimic the rise and fall of the waltz, hoping to look smooth but looking more like a clutz, most of the time, but still trying to do your best. You try to ensure you make your partner comfortable, after all you are acquaintances, fellow-learner’s, fellowship of dance. So you try your best to get the steps right, give the right lead (after all in ballroom it’s the man who shows off the woman, not outshining her), learning together with each partner change, encouraging and smiling, and yes goofing around a bit. Something you even find your self practising, trying to figure steps in the weirdest of places.

So with one level done, where I got to learn the basics of the Rhumba, Rock and Roll, Waltz and Cha Cha, it’s time to reacquaint myself with my old friend Salsa, and progress to other club, Latin ans Traditional dance styles, and take the ITSD examination, hopefully by the end of the year. So it’s going to be interesting to see where my two not quite left feet takes me.

Q