You can’t hurry LOVE!!!

You can’t hurry LOVE, you just have to wait, LOVE don’t come easy!

It’s going to make you wait and wait till you can’t take the wait no more. And just when you want to give up on it, it will slowly creep up on you, like a burglar in the night (if this still happens in a very digital world), and steal your heart without you knowing.

It will make you work and work and work with no outcome! It will show you an oasis only for it to turn out to be a mirage! 

It will make you kiss a thousand of frogs (not that I am calling the ones who I’ve dated frogs, just using the analogy, and now I am greatly digressing form the topic) till you find the one! 

On the plus side you get to meet and kiss (and much more) a few, if not many, till you eventually get there, if you are open to meeting them all.

You can’t hurry love, it’s going to take its own sweet time to get to you (if you’re lucky enough for it to find its way to you).

And although you may wear your heart on your sleeves, you can’t make a heart to love, to see you as a potential mate. And let’s face it, if you have to make someone see you that way then that may not be worth it, cause you can’t really make someone love you, you can’t force someone to have those feelings for you, just as you can’t do the same for you. You can’t hope for someone to fall in love with you, to see you for who you are and what you could be, if they are not ready for you, if they don’t want to.

And if they say that they are not in the same place as you are, they need time, know that you are better off not waiting and hoping and pining. You are doing a disservice to yourself (and the same applies when you are the one saying this).

If it has to happen it will happen. Never keep your hopes up, or hold your breath, cause it could only lead to headaches and heartbreaks (lucky are the few who’s waiting are rewarded). 

There’s going to be false starts and dead-ends and paths that lead to nowhere, going around in circle, all adding to the anxiety and tension that racks us.

But then we are fools, even after knowing it all we will still be shameless and loose our mind and sleep and increase our anxiety and hope, when we need to patient (and not become a patient of our of our own doing). Love’s going to take its own sweet time.

We are going to react when Cupid strikes with his arrows behaving like a fool, when we should be rational.

So in short, you can’t hurry love. You’ve just have to wait. Love doesn’t come easy!!!!

To LOVE and be LOVED: The greatest thing you will ever do

Everyone deserves to be loved no matter who you are, or where you’re from, or what you do. If you can love, then you deserve to be loved.

It doesn’t matter if you’re a boy or girl, man or woman, black, brown or white, or if you’re gay or straight, bi-sexual or asexual or identify as transgender or just queer. It doesn’t matter how you identify yourself and what your preference is. If you have a pulse running through your vein, then you deserve to be loved.

It doesn’t matter if you are tall or short, what’s your shape or size, or even your length or breath (now please don’t ask me what is being measured). Neither does your ethnicity and nationality and what you do matters.

You are deserving to be loved, even when you are at your lowest, when you’re at your worst, when you’re no longer young and beautiful. When you feel you’re unlovable.

In these moments you especially deserve to be loved.

Yes you can buy yourself flowers. Yes you can right your name in the sand. Yes you can talk to yourself for hours. But then wouldn’t that be more beautiful and meaningful if you could shared this with someone. If someone got you flowers. And talking to yourself even for a couple of minutes (forget hours), is never a good sign.

Yes you can pamper yourself, buy yourself expensive things. But sometimes it’s a bit nicer to be at the receiving end of someone’s love, or even be a giver.

Yes we can take care of ourselves and stand  on our own independent feet without needing anyone else, and there’s nothing wrong with that. But once in a while it’s good to be taken care of.

To love and be loved is the greatest thing we can ever do.

You may be hurting and smarting from heart breaks and heart aches or you just want to give up on love and finding love, never ever wanting to go down that road ever again.

But know this, that love will find its way to you. Cause even though you may give up on love, love will never give up. And just when  you least expect it love will creep into your life and into your heart and surprise and wrap you, hugging you tight, in its arms with delight. And next thing you know it has you all wrapped around its little finger.

You just can’t help yourself and love and be loved, cause the greatest thing you’ll ever do is just to love and be loved in return.

Wicked Game

It’s a wicked game we play when we make someone feel this way. It’s a wicked thing we do, when we make someone dream of you. In a world that’s constantly swiping left or right, it’s a wicked game we play.

In a world that’s either looking for a soulmate, or just a date, or just to fuck and forget, something long-term, or just a short-term casual fun, it’s a wicked game we play when we let someone believe in you.

And though we have our own agenda, our purpose, our own reason, we still play these wicked games building hope for those who believe it’s true.

We play these games by saying the words that a ear is yearning to hear, that a lonely soul’s thirsting to hear. We may not always mean it but still we say it, cause that’s the thing we do. We build hope, we build dreams, hoping and dreaming that what we are led to believe will come true, only to see them shatter into a thousand pieces. It’s a wicked game we play when we let someone hope about you.

In a world that’s enamoured by photographs and social media, by skin and toned bodies, it’s these pictures that seduces us, the pictures that draws in. But what happens when you meet but you hoped for isn’t met? It’s a game that we play to loose. It’s a wicked game of heartbreak, ending with someone being just another like on an app, just another match, just a number in your phone’s memory that’s soon going to be ghosted, that’s soon going to be forgotten.

It’s a game where we let our desires get the better of us. A game where we let our overthinking mind race ahead of us, where we let our lonely heart make us a gullible soul, easy to preyed on, a willing victim of our own choosing, turning us blind to red flags and detours, and filling our head with hope. It’s a wicked game make someone hope for you.

And even though we may know what’s in store, we gullibly let ourselves become pawns of these wicked games, players of these games.

It’s a wicked game we play when we make someone feel this way. It’s a wicked thing we do, when we make someone dream of you. In a world that’s constantly swiping left or right, it’s a wicked game we play.

Said I Love You… But I lied

I said I love you… but I lied

Cause these three words 

Doesn’t quite measure up 

To what you mean to me 

The feeling I have for you inside

I have lied to you

Every time I have said I love you

Because you deserve way more than love

You someone way better than me

But you chose me and I have chosen you

It’s a lie that I love you

Cause if the past few day is any proof

What we mean to each other 

Is way deeper than  that 

Way greater than words

To say I love you is a lie

Cause even though our differences 

May come in our way

May try to draw a wedge between us

But like the opposite poles of a magnet

We are drawn to each other 

I may love you but it’s a lie

Cause we are still learning 

How to work with our differences 

How to live with them

And not let them break us

Cause like a moth to a flame

I am drawn to you

I said I love you but I lied

Cause this is more than love

That I feel for you inside 

Said I love you but I lied

Cause love can never be so strong inside

Said I love you but I lied

Make you feel my LOVE

When the rain is blowing in your face

And the whole world is on your case

I could offer you a warm embrace

To make you feel my love

When the evening shadows and the stars appear

And there is no one there to dry your tears

Oh, I hold you for a million years

To make you feel my love

When you feel the world crumbling around you

And you don’t what you need to do

Just call me I’ll be there for you 

To make you feel my love

You don’t have to bear that pain alone

You don’t have to let it fester within your soul

You can talk to me when you feel lonely and alone

Just to make you feel my love

The storm is raging on the rolling sea

And on the highway of regret

The winds of change are blowing you off your feet

But I’ll hold on to you never let you get wet

You don’t have to travel alone

Or bear the burden of your cross on your own

I’ll be there to comfort and hold you

Just to feel my love

Just to feel my love!

Chiquitita

 She sat on her childhood bed, staring at the picture of a girl who was smiling back at her. The smile seemed oddly reassuring but it masked the pain behind the smile, just a facade. Oh how she wished she could travel back in time and warn her about what was in store for her, maybe then things would be different. Maybe she could guide her to a better and brighter future instead of going through the things she had gone through.

From her adolescence days she knew she was different. She was not like the other girls. She didn’t like doing the so called girlie things. Because of this she was always treated like an outsider, but then she didn’t much care about it. Her father didn’t find anything wrong with this but her mother constantly nagged her about it. Other than this they were supportive of her and always believed in the right balance of studies and extra curricular activities. But some how they still didn’t get her. 

So she found herself battling to come to terms with her true identity. Confusion and awkwardness reigned through her formative years. And when she finally managed to come to terms with her identity her parents couldn’t handle it. They feared of what society would say, of all the gossip, their standing. Not once did they consider her and what she was going through. Her mother blamed her father for being liberal with her and letting her do what she wanted to do, and her father blamed her mother for failing to see the signs despite being a woman herself.

She tried to block them out of her head, but their constant quarrels and bickering always occupied her head. It pushed her into a dark corner, a dark and lonely place, on the brink of a total breakdown. When she couldn’t take it any longer, she tried to put an end to it all. This sent her parents into a greater panic. They starting searching for marriage proposal for her, getting her married off to the one they thought was suitable and would bring some sense and sanity to her.

Marriage was something new to her, something she never thought about, something she didn’t want. But then she resigned to her faith and tried to settle in the ebb and flow of her new life. Like everything else, he showed his true colour once the honeymoon period was done. He often forced himself on her, when she refused his advances, calling it his right and her duty, leaving her physically and mentally abused, leaving her scarred and bruised. She tried to confide this in her parents but they just brushed it aside saying there would be chinks that would need to be fixed.

And then she discovered she was pregnant. She wanted to have an abortion cause she couldn’t get herself to bring another life into her dark and scary world. But her in laws and her husband would have none of it. The abuse became even more unbearable.

Finally she found the strength to take a stand and walk out of the life of pain that she was in. She initially stayed with a friend who was supportive of her, and also because she was not sure if her parents would ever take her back.

But life had other things in store for her. It finally took a turn for the best. One day, when her mother visited, she saw the scars on her body. That day they both had a breakdown, and in the flow of their tears their relationship thawed. In the flow of their tears and in that warm embrace they resolved to stand by each other.

She returned to her childhood with her mother, to even more tears of happiness. From that day on her parents made a promise to stand by her, no matter what, and they did. She knew it was difficult for them, as it was for her, with all the gossips and all the side way glances and whispers that would stop the minute they were seen. She knew it was difficult for them to accept and understand the situation but she could see the effort they were putting in and she was appreciative of it and was  happy to have them by her side, along with her friend. 

Together they were able to set her free from a toxic marriage, her rock through the turmoil. And when the baby came their joy knew no end. They became doting, gushing grandparents. Their acceptance influenced others who slowly began to accept and understand her. She was finally able to find her feet and live the life she wanted.

And so she found her self sitting on her childhood bed, staring at a pic from when she was little. She was on the cusp of something she had been through before but only this it was of her own will and her choice. She put the picture back in the frame and placed it at her beside. She sighed and eagerly waited for daybreak, the day she would marry the woman of her dreams.

Love in the time of Quarantine

We found ourselves in a strange time

In a strange time we found each other

While the world around was social distancing 

It was social networking that brought us together 

We were out there

With not much of a clue about the other 

But destiny conspired 

And social media obliged

A simple comment lead to conversation 

A conversation lead to sharing

Sharing lead to a bond 

And that bond only got stronger 

We bore our soul to each other

Narrated our past

The events of our present

And what we expected from the future 

We exposed our very being

Till there were nothing much to share

To souls laying, almost naked to each other

We poured our hearts out

Exposed scars and wounds

That we hid from the world 

Cause we didn’t want anyone to see

But we were comfortable to share it

We found a comfort level in each other 

And became comfortable with each other 

Though it may feel strange the way we found each other

Especially when considering we were healing 

From our own respective wounds

From our self inflicted scars

But we came into each other’s lives

Like a dawn in the darkest of night

A breath of fresh air in this strange, strange situation

I’ve had this feeling before

But it still feels new, feels different, feels beautiful, feels strong 

And though there may have been fears 

There have been doubts

And in my silliest of lows 

I’ve tried to push out

But the truth is I can’t bare a day without talking or seeing you

Sometimes I fear that I’ll take you for granted

And you’ll get fed up of my idiotic ways

And just give up on me

But you calmed me down and brushed away my anxiety

Helped me to be rationale and not an overthinker 

You brought calm to an overthinking mind

You gave me love, showed me love

That I had given up on

That I didn’t feel I deserved 

And through all my fears

I couldn’t help myself from falling for you

And I couldn’t hold myself back 

From saying those three words to you

Cause it encapsulated what I felt for you

What you meant to me

I did question myself about it

My mind tried to rationalise with my heart 

But then my heart won the debate

And when I said those words to you

It felt like a weight lifted off my chest

My whole world going from monochrome to technicolor 

And when you said it back to me

You lit my life with a million watts bulb

Banishing the darkness of fear and doubt 

That had engulfed my heart

Though people may scoff at us

Say we are going too fast 

And I myself may have questioned myself  

But it felt so good 

It felt so right

It felt like the right thing to do

And then, as they say, rest of it is history 

And now can’t live a single moment 

Without thinking about you

Can’t t think of a future without you in it

My feeling for you are real

My feeling for you is true

They are genuine

From a place deep within

And I know you feel the same way too

I love you for who you are

Who you will be

And how we are when we are together

And though there maybe distance between us 

I feel you all around me

Your love envelopes me

Makes me feel safe and secure

I promise you this

I’ll be there for you

Like I know you’ll be there for me

Through the ups and downs

In the good times and the bad 

In sickness and in health 

In life, death and beyond

You can lean on me, as I lean on you

You are my love, my heart, my life

The love of my life

I love you forever and always

Till my very last breath

I love you and will always love you!

.. Under the Moonlit Sky

They met under a moonlit sky

As the world lay fast a sleep

With just  a few stars out 

And the moon a witness to their meet

The world enveloped in darkness

With just the moon lighting up the night

They sat there on the bench

Side by side, hand in hand

Head on shoulder, arms around shoulder

With each other for company 

Listening to the rhythm of their heartbeat

As it beat in unison

As the world snored away

Lulled to sleep 

By the sound of the crickets chirp

And under that moonlit sky

Their love blossomed 

And in the dark, away from the prying eyes

The found each other

They needed no one or anything

Other than each other 

And the light of the moon

To bear witness to their love

They sat there, staring at the moon

Admiring how beautiful it looked 

Along with its blemishes 

A beautiful bindi adorning the head of the sky

Like the moon they knew they were perfectly imperfect 

Two beautiful souls drawn to each other

Like the moon affecting the tide

They felt drawn to each other

Touching each other’s lives

Affecting each other’s lives

And under the moonlit sky

Far from the prying eyes, they kissed 

With all the passion burning within them 

Sealing the love they felt for each other

With just the moon as their witness

They needed no one at all

The moon looked on

And she smiled seeing them

Witnessing their love

Not once wanting to move her eyes from them

Not because she was a voyeur 

But she wanted to be light in their life

She smiled to see their love blossomed into something beautiful 

So she shone brightly on them 

As they fell in love under the moonlight

A Rendezvous in the Moonlight

The baking had taken longer than he has expected it to. He knew that he would be late for their meeting. He could have either postponed their meeting and carried on with his baking, or he could have postponed his baking and gone and met him. But he wanted to do both, after all he was doing one for the other. So he continued to bake. 

As soon as it was baked, he left it too cool on the rack and hurried to get ready for their meeting. Once it had cooled down, he boxed it, got on to his bike and off he went. All along the ride he wondered if his effort would be appreciated, would be liked. He was excited, not because of their meeting but what he was getting to their meeting, something that was made specifically, not for the occasion, but for someone specific.

So he rode down as fast as he could, as fast as the speed limit permitted him, as fast as his two-wheeler took him. He didn’t want to upset the content of the box, so he made sure he rode carefully. Although cautious he felt excited and could feel the butterflies fluttering in his system. He had this strange nervous excitement in him.

As he reached his destination he could make out his silhouette in the moonlight. Seeing him, he ran towards him and gave him a tight hug, hoping that the warmth he felt, on seeing him,  could be transferred to him. So he embraced him tightly, never wanting to let go, never bothered of what would the world say.

Slowly he wriggled out of the embrace and took him by the hand and led him back to his two-wheeler. This wasn’t where they were supposed to be, their rendezvous point, but since he was going to be late (like really late) he decided it would be best to pick him up from somewhere near his place and head to where they were to meet.

So they got on to the bike and rode to their destination. As he rode he could feel a cool breeze on his face but at the same time he could feel the warmth of his breath at the back of his neck. As they drove he could feel the warmth of his embrace as he held on to him tightly. He could feel his head on his back as they slowly made their way to their destination.

He didn’t want the moment to end. He wanted to stay there and live in the moment forever, never wanting to come out of it. But he could hear the ocean calling, the sound of the waves running towards the shore. He knew their destination was near. Reaching, he stopped at the designated parking lot and parked his two-wheeler there. He took him by the hand and lead him to the beach. 

Reaching the there they kicked off their shoes, because he wanted to feel the coolness of the  sand between their feet, and also they didn’t want to get sand in their shoes. They walked for a while, strolling hand in hand down the beach in the moonlight. 

At last they came to a familiar spot, one they had been to many times before. He sat down on the sand and with it pulling him down towards him. He removed the content of the box and stared at it. Be then took a small bite of it, slowly trying to savour it, take in the taste of the chocolate that had thankfully not melted.

He stared at his face trying to gauge his reaction. He took another bite and then slowly closed his eyes, as if to let the taste sink in. He just looked at him admiring the way he relished the chocolate ganache tart which he has specifically baked for him.

When the content of the box was completed, he leaned over and gently kissed him on his cheek, and put his had hands around his arms. He in turn put his hands across his shoulders, pulled him closer, as he rested his head on it. They sat there under the starry skies, with just the moonlight to illuminate the night, staring at the inky black ocean, letting their bodies and their love to keep each other warm. They let the waves play a symphony, serenading them, as they made the most of their rendezvous under the bright moonlight.

Love at First Dance

She had seen this place a numerous times, in pictures, but never in person. Yet as she walked towards it, she was not prepared to take in how beautiful it was. She wanted to but she had other things on her mind. Inspite it all what she saw took her breath away.

As she walked towards it she could feel the butterflies flutter in her stomach. Although she tried to calm them down, they just refused to settle. She could feel them fluttering around her stomach. She could feel her nerves.

Why oh why did she agree to something so crazy, something she had never done before, something that she would never do. Yet here she was, on the brink of doing the unthinkable, something she never thought she was capable of. She normally never gave into peer pressure, but how did she made an exception to do this?

She walked towards the place, and stood with her back to the light post. She could feel her heart beat at a million km/hr, threatening to explode from her chest, if that was possible. As she stood there, she would hear his footsteps, causing her heart to race even faster. She was tempted to turn around and get a quick peek. But then that was not what she was instructed to do. She waited patiently, fighting the temptation.

And then the music began to play. She turned around, going from post to post trying to catch a glimpse of him. But then he too did the same. So they continued to dodge each other, each trying to get the glimpse of the other, till their eyes finally met and they locked on to each other, and never left each other for the rest of the moment.

He was the most handsome man she had set her eyes, at least in a while (ok make that in quite a while). He was athletically built but not muscular. He was lean but not ripped. He was not a model but he could definitely get heads to turn, to stand out in a crowd. He was stylish, and though you could credit the stylist for that, whatever he wore, he carried it with aplomb and swag that was all his own, you could give him that, no one could take that away from him. He may have not been perfect, but for her he was her version of the perfect Prince Charming.

He took her by the hand and twirled her, causing her heart to skip a beat. He held her firmly by the shoulder but not roughly, rather tenderly. He gently caressed her with his fingertips, letting them run down the side of her neck, never once making her feel uncomfortable, sending a tingling feeling down her spine. She fell backward into his arms, in an almost trust-fall, melting into his arms. He caught her and twirled with ease, lifting her, making feel as light as a feather. As he guided her, lead her, he made her feel safe and secure, as they flowed from post to post, in sync to the music. 

Not once did he break eye contact, speaking through his touch, through his eyes, assuring her “we’ve got this! I’ve got you!” Not once did he make her feel awkward or uncomfortable. She felt safe and secure, she felt like she was floating on air, light as a feather. She felt like a princess in a fairytale, and the place only added to it. His every touch sent so many sparks flying. She felt combustible, as if his touch lit a thousand of flames within her. She didn’t care about choreography. She just followed his every lead. 

He was no professional but his leads were clear and precise. He guided her across with ease and purpose. If he was nervous or uncertain, he didn’t show it. He was confident and had poise and grace. When it came to the final lift, he caught her by the waist as she came towards him, lifting her up, while turning around, slowly bringing her down as they continued to spin, into his arms, and melting on to the floor, where they lay for a while, which felt like eternity.

As she lay there in his arms, with her head on chest, she didn’t want the moment to end. She didn’t care about the light drizzle that had begun to fall. She just wanted to lay there in his arms, staring into the endless sky, like what could lay in front of them. 

But like everything, the moment had to come to end. The song may have come to end but they still continued to breathe in unison. He got to his feet and helped her up, like the gentleman he was. As she walked away, he waited to see her go, and then went on his way, as if hoping for one more glance, hoping she would turn around one more time.

As she walked with her hand on her heart, she could feel her heart flutter. She tried to catch her breath, to calm herself down, but it just refused to calm down. How could it after it had experienced something truly magical, something right out of the pages of a romance novel. This was something so unlike her. Though she was hesitant, had her doubts, thinking it the most foolish thing she had ever done, risking it all. But now that she had done it, she was glad to have taken the chance, taken the risk. She couldn’t get enough of it, she wanted more. 

Who was he, the man who had swept her off her feet, danced his way into her heart. Who had set her heart on fire, who set fire to the rain. Who was he? She needed to know more about him, she craved for his touch, for the chemistry they shared. She needed more of him. And as she walked away, she wondered if it was possible to fall in love at first dance!

The Fool for Love

We are fools for love

We are in love

With the feeling of being loved

And loving back in return!

We may try to hide from it

We may try to avoid it

But in the end we all are victims

Of Cupid’s wicked ways.

Through the heartaches 

Through the heartbreaks

We promise ourselves never again

We harden our hearts

We steel our will

We threaten our hearts

And make it promise it never will

But no matter what we may try to do

Love finds its way to you

We don’t know when 

We don’t know where

We don’t know how

We don’t know who

Ans though we may try

To desperately to avoid it

We can’t help ourselves

But be that fool in love!

Love knows no reason

Love know no boundaries

Neither thus it know

Gender, age, religion, culture or country 

It just lets us love

To love without expectations

With hope that the love we feel

Will flourish and grow

Into something very special!

You can never hate yourself 

For the things that you feel

You feel what you feel

Whether it’s reciprocated or not

You cannot judge your worth

Whether your feelings are

Reciprocated or not

Whether your feelings are returned

Is in the hands of the other

Your love may be reciprocated manifolds 

And at times it may be not

But you never cease to love 

No matter what!

Don’t deny yourself the feeling

Cause to feel that way

Is the most natural thing to do

Cause you’ll feel what you feel

You’ll love who you love

Whether you can help it or not

Whether it’s reciprocated or not

Sometimes you got give it time

For love to bloom and come to you

You’ve got to be patient and calm

Cause if it’s in your destiny

Then it will find a way to thee

If it’s meant to be it will be

When it’s in your destiny!

So don’t fret, don’t loose faith

Don’t loose hope

Cause love will find a way to you 

We can’t help ourselves but love

Cause love is what we can do

Though we may try our best to not

But all we want is to love

And be loved in return

Cause love is all we need

Cause love is all we want

So live, love, hope

Cause life is beautiful 

When you’re in love!

Come Away with Me

Come away with me

Let’s leave this world behind

To a place they can’t hurt us

With their judgemental eyes

Come away with me

Let’s leave our cares behind

For a moment put our burden down

Stop worrying just for a while

I don’t know 

If I can make your burdens light

Or make your cares disappear 

But what I promise is to

Stand forever by your side

You can share your burdens with me

And together we we will find a way

Out of the worries and the care

You don’t have to bear it by yourself

You can always share it with me

And I can try to make it light

Come away with me 

We can escape 

To a world our own

Far from their judgemental eyes

Come away with me

To a world of love 

Far from them 

Who tell us our love is impure

Come away with me

To a world we can make our own

Away from those 

Who tell us we can’t love this way

I want to wake up with you

While the rain falls gently outside

Playing a tune 

The score of our love

I want lay there with you 

With you in my arms

Leaving our cares outside

To never bother us for a while

I want to hold you tight

And tell you that everything will be alright 

Cause no matter what

You’ll have me by your side

Come away with me

Let’s lay down 

And make love

Till it’s morning light

Come away with me 

And let our touch 

Set the night on fire

burn our cares away

Come away with me 

We can kiss

All our cares away

Even if it’s just for a while

Come away with me

Cause I can’t stop myself

From loving you

So all I ask of you

Is to come away with me

Into the night

Why don’t you come away with me!