Turning 41

I thought turning 40 was a milestone but somehow turning 41 has proven to a much bigger milestone than I thought it would be. I am surviving a pandemic but more importantly I am surviving myself, surviving my anxiety, my fears, my self-doubts, the thoughts in my head!

But should I discount off 2020? Should I write it off? No way Jose! Absolutely not! There’s so much I have learned from it, so there’s no way I am gonna write it off!

I have learned that although rules are meant to be broken, there are certain rules that need to be followed. Imagine if we did follow some rules diligently, we wouldn’t find ourselves in the mess we are in.

The adage “All that glitters is not gold” and “Empty vessels make the most noise” holds true when it comes to Social Media and news channels.

I have learned that the word “atmanirbhar” has more meaning to it, if you just read between the lines.

I have learned that distraction can be a very effective ploy if you want to draw attention away from the pain, draw attention away from things that really matter.

I have learned to just try and switch off and tune out the din around you, cause it’s just empty vessels making noise, which can be so far from the truth and doesn’t need to affect you. But then the operative word here is trying, doesn’t mean I have succeeded in doing it.

I have learned that people are motivated for their own selfish benefit, which is something very human (sadly), we just got to read between the lines and act accordingly.

I have learned that following a recipe is the easiest way of baking, and baking can be both stressful and therapeutic. And yes it can add to the digits that appear on your weighing scale.

I have learned you don’t need to go to the gym to burn calories. Just get a pair of dumbbells, some resistance bands and you can workout right from the comfort of your own home.

I have learned that you don’t need to got to a place of worship to pray. God is everywhere. Monuments are just symbols. 

I have had some wonderful moments with my mum. Whether it is bonding over baking or cooking together, whether it is reciting the rosary, or going to the market. I’ve managed to spend more time with her, fussing over her, talking with her, being protective of her, than I would. On the opposite end, I am sure she’s fed up of me as she doesn’t get to see her TV shows, and I am always worrying about her.

I have learned the importance of friends and colleagues (ok the only the good ones). It’s been months since you have met some of them, talked to some of them, and you sure do miss them.

I have learned that gifts that come from a place deep within are the best gifts you could receive, and you have family and loved ones who keep showing you that every time. Even a simple message means a lot.

I have learned to appreciate nature more, cause while we were in lockdown, nature blossomed.

But most importantly I’ve learned to Be Kind and empathetic. We all are in this together, and If we need to make it through, we need each other. We all have our crosses to bear. We all have our share of pain and sorrow, some maybe more than others. But we can make it through by sharing and caring. Nothing good can come from tearing others down and finger pointing and name calling. 

So in the end the biggest lesson that 2020 taught me is to Be Kind, Be Strong, Be Appreciative of what you have and all who you have in your life. Don’t take life for granted. You have just one life to live and have a whole lot of love to give.

The Photograph: A slice in time

I sat there, minding my business, trying to appear, even if I wasn’t quite busy as I looked, when my mumma handed me a photograph which she had come across during one of her many draw cleaning sessions.

As I stared at the photograph that she had given me, I tried to recollect the morning can’t time when it was taken, rummaging through the deep recesses of my mind. But then it wasn’t about the time when the photograph was taken. It was people who were in it , the ones staring back at me, who may or may not be smiling for the camera.

These were the people who I so loved and cherished, people to whom I credit who I am today. People who taught me so much about life, about love, about family. People who I would sadly never see again.

And yet they continued to live on in this photograph, immortalised on this piece of glossy paper. It was as if this photograph had carved out a slice in, a moment for all eternity.

And though the people in the photograph had long since passed on to a better place, they continued to live on, as they did, etched on the walls of mind.

So as I placed the photograph aside, I just smiled, cherishing the memory that the photograph had made, a slice of time captured for all eternity.